“Rainy Day People”

by  Gordon Lightfoot

Rainy day people always seem to know when it’s time to call
Rainy day people don’t talk
They just listen til they’ve heard it all
Rainy day lovers don’t lie when they tell you
They been down like you
Rainy day people don’t mind if you’re crying a tear or two
If you get lonely, all you really need is that rainy day love
Rainy day people all know there’s no sorrow they can’t rise above
Rainy day lovers don’t love any others, that would not be kind
Rainy day people all know how it hangs on a piece of mind
Rainy day lovers don’t lie when they tell you, they’ve been down there too
Rainy day people don’t mind if you’re crying a tear or two
Rainy day people always seem to know when you’re feeling blue
High stepping strutters who land in the gutter sometimes need one too
Take it or leave it, or try to believe it, if you’ve been down too long
Rainy day lovers don’t hide love inside they just pass it on
Rainy day lovers don’t hide love inside they just pass it on

 

Do you remember what it felt like having a best friend, someone to share your secrets with, cry with when you fell down and scraped your knees, to laugh and giggle with over silly things and sillier people? Although, for most of us, that best friend definition reminds us of childhood and those long hard days of growing up and maybe never believing we’d get there, I also believe that we continue to search for more of the same throughout our existence. That feeling of warm welcome and always acceptance when eyes meet. Hugs and pats on the back when needed most. Someone who helps you stay in line without jerking you around. Someone who cheers when you succeed, and boos the competition when you don’t quite do so. Someone who lets you know that you are doing the best with what you’ve been given, respects any effort you put out, and knows you will give back the same without being prompted.

We grow up and get busy being the adults we never thought we would become. But there are always those days when the busyness stops and we realize that we need something more. As I started writing this, I could hear the old Gordon Lightfoot song lyrics playing through my mind. We all need rainy day people, a best friend, at some point or another. We also know that best friends grow up, change, go their own way, and fade from the present moment in numerous ways. Wouldn’t it be nice to have a rainy day best friend anytime, all the time? You can and you do. The very best rainy day friend you can ever have is you.

It begins as all relationships do: with a dialogue, communication of one sort or another. At the cost of repeating myself, the most important dialogue you will ever engage in, is that one with your own person. It is going on constantly, every moment of every day, but if you don’t pay attention, don’t listen and respond, it can fade away just like that best friend from childhood. Writing daily, on a personal level, is a deliberate conscious move to make a friendship with the only person you will always have with you. We are all rainy day people, if we allow ourselves to be. We are all best friends, if we want to be that.

Stop for a moment. Think about what you want in a best friend, who do you turn to on those rainy days that we all encounter far more than we’d like? And yes, I know that many of you will answer that question by saying that you find those things in God, or a belief system. Personally, I still need a Jesus with skin on Him, when the storm is raging outside and the lights go out and don’t come back on. I want a real voice speaking in my ear, words I can physically hear whispering comforting things, or singing a lullaby to soothe me. That isn’t to say I don’t think, or believe, that God will get me through, it just means I have realized that I still want someone to hold my hand while God does whatever God is going to do.

I used to ask a question when I found myself in the midst of one of those storms. People have a tendency to come to me when they need a rainy day friend. But when I’d find myself alone on one of those rainy days, I would often find myself asking the empty air, “Where is my Elizabeth, when I need her?” One day, to my own startled shock, after once again yelling that question toward the ceiling, I heard a distinct, but very familiar voice in my head, say with a lot of affectionate laughter, “She’s sitting right here asking that very silly question, again.” I had to join in the laughter and that in turn, felt like a warm well-needed hug.

But there is something else that is just as important about this truth and reality. We all fight loneliness and the fear of being, or becoming, just another lonely individual. We struggle with it and allow ourselves to be bent by that fear. We stay in places and relationships to avoid what we fear most. we allow people to remain in our lives long after they have lost any resemblance to the definition of a friend. No matter how many people, pets, or diverse belief systems we embrace, there always comes that moment when we must confront the fact that we are essentially alone within our own skin. That is the moment we most need the best rainy day friend within our own being.

No, this doesn’t happen over night. Most things of enduring value don’t. It takes practice, commitment, and day to day work. But if you are willing to do some of the things I am suggesting, I can promise you that you will find the very best rainy day friend you can imagine or ever dream up. So, get on paper and start defining what a best friend really is, start letting yourself know what a rainy day person would look like to you. Then ask yourself what you need to do to make that happen, how and what you need to do to become your own best rainy day friend.

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